sleazy salesman, sucker customer

Okay, I really needed to get my sitting room (not living, not family ... we do that in every room! ... no TV ... so what do I call it? My parlor? Truly, these things keep me up at night) carpet cleaned. My stupid dogs had pretty much ruined it and I knew my little cheap steam cleaner was not going to do the trick.

So I get a valpak with coupons in it and there is a coupon for 14.99 for two rooms ... except berber carpet. Shoulda heard the cha ching right there.

They come out and give an estimate and then will do the work then. Hmmmm. Just tell me.

Okay so this guy gets here with two other workers. He is all ... Mr. Salesman. For carpet cleaning? He does a test spot. Looks good to me. I say okay and THEN we sit down while he writes it up and I watch these two strong guys getting really, really bad pee stains out of my carpet. I now know I should have said ... what is the price before you start. What is wrong with me? One is born every minute.

Oh, oh he started with how nice my furniture is. Where did I get it? I point to the coffee table and tell him a consignment shop and am about to move on to my other finds when he says no, the sofa and chairs. I am like. Oh that's from Ikea. I point out where the boy dog lifts his legs and pees on the slipcovers and he says let's do a test spot on that. Whoa. No thanks. I can wash them. Are you sure he asks, have you read the tag. Yes. So, at least he didn't get that business out of me.

Anyhoo, the charges keep adding up. $75 for urine decontamination. Hmmmm. We have all been walking on that carpet for quite a while as nasty as it is. We have been contaminated? Well, Michael did say walking on it with bare feet was gross. I always wear shoes so what do I know.

And for just $30 more I can get Dupont Teflon put on the rug and then that will give me a warranty for all the carpet in my house. It was only for a year so I questioned that and he got on the phone with his boss and they extended it to three years. So any room in my house can be now cleaned for free. All I have to do is pay for the teflon treatment. As priced. Wonder if the per room charge will go up when I try to use it.

Oh whatever. My rug looks brand new. It is still wet though because they did really work hard on it. I just paid double what I was prepared to pay and I feel like I was taken advantage of.

And I really want to kill my stupid dogs who despite all my efforts still won't be housebroken. You know I found them both. Or did they find me ... one of those suckers born every minute.

And so it goes.